I did some hating on dreamhost back in the day, but all-in-all, these guys are solid. Their customer service is top-notch, hosting is generally stable, and they have a custom (backend) panel that will make most other hosting companies drool.
This post was inspired by how lousy (I seriously can’t believe I just used that lame word without thinking about it…) crappy I’ve been treated the last couple of weeks by Dreamhost rival, Simple Helix. Lets jump into the reasons why I feel the urge to hate on Simple Helix at this point in time.
1. They owe me money.
Yeah, this is a bit of a change in roles. Simple Helix owes this kid money. You know that little banner at the top of this post that says (not for much longer) “Simple Helix is my Magento Hosting Company”? Well, I make commission every time somebody clicks that link, goes to SH, and buys a hosting package. This isn’t the only site that I advertised for Simple Helix on, but I have brought them quite a few customers. Current balance they owe me: $400+. It’s been a good two weeks since I first requested an affiliate withdrawal. Each request is “forwarded to admin” whatever that means. So far it hasn’t meant me getting paid. I finally talked to a human on the phone today and I was told that I will be paid within the next day or two…
2. Their (tech & sales) support sucks.
I purchased an SSL certificate a few days ago, contacted SH with information on where to install it, and all that good stuff. They will usually install the thing within a few hours, but I’ve been waiting 4 days or so with no response…my client is pissed because his site is taking longer than it should to be ready. I realize things happen, but when you claim one-hour support, you better at least reply within a day…or two…or three. Not to mention, their ticket system is all sorts of jacked up. I will submit a ticket, not get a response for a day, then all of a sudden I get a response to that one ticket from 3 different people, each telling me different things.
3. Tons of down time.
“Jeremy, don’t tell me my site is down again.” If I have to hear this one more time, I think I will do something drastic… I have a few clients that I have hosted at Simple Helix and I get calls, emails, several times a day sometimes about their site being down. I check, and sure enough, even my board game site is down – also hosted on SH.
4. Phone support? Live Chat? Email Support?
What support? When I first signed up, they claimed to have live chat support. I got on there a few times and if anybody was even there, I wasn’t helped. Other times I would sit with a browser window open for 10 hours (not an exaggeration) and wait for a response that never came… I’m sure their live chat was just some outsourced position that they paid some dude 25 cents for every hour he worked. Apparently they could no longer keep up with paying him because live chat no longer exists. Phone support? I was pretty sure that when I signed up with them they listed a phone number on their site…I can’t find one anymore. Email support responses typically consist of “forwarding to admin”. How is that support?
5. They just suck.
It takes quite a bit for me to get pissed off at a company, but these guys have done it. I’m not just saying all of this to make Simple Helix look bad for no reason, that would be stupid. I could lie about how wonderful they still are and continue to make some nice commission with their affiliate program. Put plainly: I’ve had enough of their garbage. As far as I can tell, Simple Helix is just a massive reseller for another, larger, crappier company and I was the victim of a well-put-together landing page. All of the “fastest Magento hosting” and “100% uptime” claims are garbage. As soon as I can scrape together a few more pennies to switch to a newly found hosting company, I’m out of here.
Even now that this post has been written, I debate whether to publish it or not. Doing so will guarantee I won’t make any affiliate commission from this site in the coming months, but I’m willing to take the hit. I’ll find another company that is worth giving money to and I’ll tell all of you guys about it!
To get back to praising Dreamhost: If you’re just starting out in the world wide web of development, I’d suggest signing up with them. They offer one-click-installs for popular software like Drupal and WordPress which come in handy and they have (generally) solid hosting backed by solid support.
Sign up with Dreamhost | Give Simple Helix a go
I’d like to hear your comments if you have any experience with either Simple Helix or Dreamhost.
UPDATE: Steve from Simple Helix just contacted me a few minutes ago (it’s 2:00 PM right now) and apologized about the delay with affiliate commissions they have been having. Apparently Steve bought Simple Helix from Jay at the beginning of this year and Paypal has given them the same hell they have given me and several others. i.e. freezing accounts due to “suspicious” activity etc…
It was good to talk to Steve, and I’m glad that my money is on its way, but this alone doesn’t solve the other issues I’ve been having. Still haven’t heard anything about my SSL certificate besides someone else telling me they are forwarding the request to “admin”. Kinda funny, I hear about this “admin” character so much, and I think I just talked to him on the phone. Admin = Steve. Steve = Admin. lol. Right on.
I hope Simple Helix can clean up their act and get their hosting issues squared up.
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